Late night conversations

Your Center City Correspondent wants you to know that one of the biggest differences between living in town and living in the suburbs is the number and volume of late night conversations that you overhear. In the classic marital dilemma, your CCC is a windows-open guy, that is, he likes to sleep with the window open. Fresh air and soft breezes coming through the window are so much better than stale air conditioning. And with the window open, you overhear so many late night conversations coming from the sidewalk below. In the hinterlands, you might hear a kid once in a while, and you just tell him to keep it down. But here in town there are just so many and of such a variety that it is worth it to eavesdrop on them.


There are at least two main types: bar groups and lovers’ quarrels. With a bar at the corner and another one two blocks away, we hear a lot of the first type. People on their way to the bar or on their way home, and obviously, on the way home is much more lively and louder. And everybody agrees that it’s the girls who make most of the noise. You can hear them approach like a flock of pigeons with their chattering and laughing, then get very loud as they pass by, and then fade into the distance. It gets really bad around the end of school, or the start of school, or any holiday, or if there’s a big game, like this evening’s Flyers game. Of course, if the home team loses, the crowd is much more subdued, not that I’m wishing ill on the Flyers. The timing of these conversations is anywhere from 1:30 to 2:30, that's AM.

Some of my favorite conversations I’ve overheard over the years:

Girl #1: Why is the sidewalk all wet?
Girl #2: Because it’s raining, silly.
Uncontrollable giggling.

Numerous voices: Chattering and laughing
Girl #1: Geez,  I wish I was down the shore.
Boy #1: Well just close your eyes and pretend you’re there.
Numerous voices: More chattering, etc. getting closer
Girl #1: Eek! Muffled sounds.
Boy #1: What happened?
Girl #1: I closed my eyes and tripped on the sidewalk!

Boy#1: Hey Bill!
Bill: What!
Boy #1: I’m going to the Green Room. Want to come?
Bill: Dude, you just got tossed out of there. They don’t want to see you anytime soon.
Boy #1: Oh.

Or my favorite:
Boy #1: Charlie. Charlie. Hey, Charlie!!
Me (from the window): What do you want?
Boy #1: We were just passing by and thought we’d say hello.
Boy #2: It wasn’t we. It was you.
Boy #1: Ok. Charlie, what are you doing?
Me: I’m trying to sleep.
Boy #1: You want to go to St. Stephen’s?
Me (after pondering the question for about a second): No thanks. Maybe tomorrow.
Boy #2: I told you he wouldn’t.
Boy #1: OK. See you later.
Voice from bed: Would you please close that window!

The lovers’ quarrels usually come later, after 3AM and they can range from short, sharp spats to long-winded discussions about the other person’s heritage, parentage or sexual practices. I try not to listen to them too closely, they can be kinda scary. Once in a great while, the cops show up and try to restore peace. Then the two lovers turn on the police and settle their differences quickly by taking them out on the cop.

Some people think these late night conversations are nuisances. I find the humor in them, and one of the things that endears me to the city. If I ever moved back out to the hinterlands, I’d have to hire a few people to stand outside my window and make some noise, just so I’d feel more at home.

Go Flyers and Go Phillies!!